September 20, 2011

  • Bully: A Gay Story

    Well This song is by Shiny Toy Guns and it is called "Sky fell over me" I thought it would be somewhat appropriate. Starts off like it's going to be a dancy song, but its not. The lyrics is what I wanted to really make apparent.

    I really hate talking about bullying and the idea of people taking the time to seriously torture someone else is sickening. Of course we all get into arguments with people and insult them and such but I would never personally take the time to continually mock and make fun of someone for personal pleasure. I actually came across an article today (on facebook), that someone shared about a young teenager whom committed suicide because he was frequently bullied. If you'd like to read this article you can Click here A new window will open.

    Before I would of said (and have said) that these kids are just weak and should realize how much more they are hurting others by hurting themselves. I've come to realize how hard it must be to have to endure such torture on a daily basis, for such a long time. I'm sure it was pretty horrible and I can imagine how they must have felt but I could never live it.

    It's sick to know that kids and adults alike spend so much time doing this to people, and for something as small as their sexual orientation, or even something as simple as they aren't "popular" as they are. I actually found a video (that i'll post after this) about how this guy that vlogs on youtube, had someone drive by and call him a faggot, horrible word to call someone.

    I found it kind of ironic because I too just recently had someone that drove by as I was crossing the street call me a "faggot" and when I heard it it made me wonder how I would of dealt with that if I was younger. Knowing myself, if I was younger and had someone just randomly call me that, I would have probably broken down, cried, felt insecure, etc. When I came back from thinking like that, I thought about how I really feel about that word now. It did strike a nerve with me for about 10-15 minutes. Then I slowly got over it. The only thing that really hit the nerve was that they only had the balls to call me such a name as they were driving by. I am definately not ashamed of who I am, and cannot say I have been truly bullied when I was younger. I had people joke around with me because of my sexuality, but it never really offended me, nor made me feel bullied.

    If someone had something to say to me, they never did, or they did it behind my back and when I found out about it, I wouldn't confront them but they'd know I heard what they said, and never said anything to my face. I made it obvious I was waiting for them to call me a fag to my face but nothing. Their courage is only fueld by the ignorance they've embraced. When they are around their friends, they can do ANYTHING. A lone, they are NOTHING. Remember that, and everyday you'll get a bit stronger. I have, and even now when I think about that guy calling me a faggot, it doesn't phase me. I actually find him pathetic, and laugh at the fact that he has his own insecurities that he wanted to verbalize to me, but his insecurities are worse than the ones I could ever have / had.

    here is the video with the guy's story about his little incident with the drive by insults.

     

    - ArmandoLush
    "Dare to be different"

Comments (10)

  • It's good to see you back! I hope things are a little less hectic for you now. I'm in agreement with your subject today. While words are quite hurtful, I have been the victim of serious violence because of being gay. When I was in high school, for example, I was lured into a situation and jumped. I was so badly beaten that I missed most of my Senior year. My facial bones and sinus cavity on the right side of my face were crused and I received a couple of knife wounds in my gut & lost a lot of blood. I had never tried to approach these guys or anything for sex.  This was hard to explain to my parents because they didn't know I was gay. (It was a lot harder to be out then-late 60's, early 70's) The police never did anything because the logic was at the time that "if you're a queer, that's what you deserve".  The people that did it were never arrested, or even questioned for that matter. I hope that things continue to improve.

  • People are born gay, they arent made gay by how they were raised. People are the way they are due to peers/parental guidance/not being comfortable with their own sexuality. Great book to read is the Matthew Sheppard book. Im very active in the LBGT, I love Gay Pride Days its the only place where my 8 yr old has so much fun. 

  • Agree with you 100%. You actually reminded me of a video  I saw earlier this morning of a guy coming out to his dad because of the repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell with a positive outcome. Link goes to NPR which talked up the video that has gotten a lot of views in a short period of time, if you just want to search for the video on YouTube it is "Telling My Dad I Am Gay" by areyousurprised. 

     Just thought I would post a reply of hope that although some people out there are difficult and not understanding, it isn't always that way! 

  • This also reminds me of an instance about fifteen years where I was counseling a young alcohol and drug abuser. As a member of AA, I knew a few of the members and this young man felt a kinship to me. Turns out he was gay, and like many of us, struggling with it. We discussed these things as much or more than his substance abuse issues. As he was preparing to turn 21, he decided to come out to his parents. I told him to follow his heart but to be very careful because not everyone reacts the same way. Sadly, as it turns out, his parents (especially his dad) reacted horribly, called him alot of really hurtful names and threw him out of the house. He called me about 3 A.M. and was crying hysterically. I asked where he was, told him to stay there and rushed to meet him. I sat with him in an all-nite coffee shop for 2-3 hours and tried to get him to calm down and maybe come home with me so that he wouldn't be out on the street alone. Finally, he said that he was doing better and wanted to go on his way. I told him to call me if he needed me. An hour or so later I got a text message from him saying "I'm Sorry. I'm so sorry"  I tried to call him but there was no answer.As it turns out, I got a call from the police the next day who found my number and txt message in his cell phone. After our meeting, he went back to his parents house and shot himself in the head in the front yard. I was devastated and kept trying to figure out what more I could have done to help him. Finally, a friend of mine helped me to realize that I wasn't to blame. I tried to help him as best I could. His father called me from the cell phone and wanted to know if I was one of his son's "faggot friends". I just told him that I felt sorry for him because he was so ignorant and his son's death taught him nothing. I never heard from him again.

    The reason for me telling this story is to show how devastating and hurtful words can be. I hope that his parents learned something.

  • You've got such a beautiful soul. I was bullied myself growing up for being gay, my whole class shunned me and I would go home from school everyday to hate emails everyone used to send me. It's so special cause now in NYC being gay is like the new trend. Everyone now is bi like its the new black. It makes me sick.  

  • I'm going to recommend this. I don't have any personal stories except to say that I once went to this church where the youth group was dominated by two guys, one a bully and another his friend who loved riding skateboards and they were absolutely convinced that because I didn't skateboard, I was gay.

    They used basically any chance to pick on me for being "gay". I finally got fed up and "came out" to them to shut them up.

    One day, several years later, the bully's friend committed suicide.

  • "Here's six feet of shit, here's you."

    I couldn't have said it any better. Besides, it was wicked funny.

    I'm sorry anyone has to put up with that. It doesn't help to know (even though it's true) that the bully is an insecure, inadequate waste of space, when they spend so much of their time making someone else feel like one. People really need to stop for a moment and think before they say or do anything that could potentially destroy someone inside.

  • I was relentlessly bullied throughout all of school, and I must say, it DOES come back to them, Karma does exist.  I was picked on for several reasons, one of which is that I wasn't skinny as a rail.  I was never obese, but I wasn't a stick either.  All those people are now fat, unmarried, with ten kids and no baby daddy.  I am married, THREE kids, and the same size (and getting smaller).  Who's laughing now?

  • "Their courage is only fueled by the ignorance they've embraced. When they
    are around their friends, they can do ANYTHING. Alone, they are
    NOTHING."

    Word, Mando.

  • First of all , I am really sorry this took me so long to reply to all of you. I truly do appreciate your stories and comments you placed on here =]

    @DaKingfish - aww thanks, They haven't really been hectic lol just very busy but i've been enjoying how busy it has been =] I am really sorry to hear that you were attacked in such a way. That really makes me sad to know people would be so cruel, but I know that's the mentality people had back then, and some even still have that mentality now.
    @pocketfullofsunshines - I agree, I was born this way and so were others. people are so ashamed of what they are they will go to extremes to "fix themselves" why fix yourself if you're not even broken, but they are brainwashed to think they are broken because of how they were raised. Even then, how they were raised not always is the reason why people act the way they do, we are our own person but some cannot act as their own person, they have to "join a side" rather than think for themselves. Awe that's cute, pride is fun, I have fun there but over here some people take it too far and think of it as a means of finding sexual pleasure, it's very disappointing. 

    @bealibertarian -  awe honestly, I did actually see that video before I posted about this. But I really appreciate you sharing it with me =] 

    @sauchingy - Awe well thanks hun, well the one thing they denied themselves is the opportunity to see how beautiful of a person YOU are =] I know I don't know you very well but I can tell. Well I agree with you, but not just in NYC, it's everywhere. I think now that their is less scandal for being gay (as far as coming out goes) it's easier for people to come out and for others to accept them, or at least try to none the less. 
    @how2saveaplanet - haha awe, excuse me for laughing but I did find that a little funny =/ and horrible of course no one should be bullied, even to the point where you have to "come out" just to have them stop bullying you.
    @ZombieMom_Speaks - haha i like the quote =] I dont know really what to say to you but I completely agree with you 100%  Those people need to learn tolerance, rather than be ruled by their one and only tyrant and his name is "insecurity" 

    @spicycajun - I am really sorry you were bullied like that in school. I agree karma is a bitch, he/she takes names and kicks their ass when they least expect it. The saying goes "good things come to those who wait" I believe those who are bullied are very patient even if patience comes with misery but the more patient they are, the better their life will get. I know some friends who have also been bullied throughout school and they never did anything to be vengeful and now they are beautiful soles like they were before, live happy, meaningful lives while those who bullied them are walking the streets beggin for food, have no job, have a gajillion kids they cannot afford to feed, are drug addicts, etc etc. Karma is definately a bitch, and i love her lol

    PSS. Thanks again to all of you soo much for sharing your stories with me
    @Watch_asIwalkaway -  =]

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